Depressed with testicle, rectum and coccyx pain.

[MrDavid]

Hi there. I'm a male, 25 years old, and I have been suffering from pain in the pelvic region for 4 months now (or maybe 2. 5 years without knowing).

It all started (?) in 2016 with tailbone pain while I was at a hometrainer in the gym. In other words, there was no direct injury. During this period of time I had a horrible relationship with my former GF, which left me totally depressed. She cheated on me and mentally destroyed me.

After zero success with chiropractors and PT, someone suggested pelvic floor PT. Unfortunately it didn't work, and to be very honest with you, I also did not really gave it a chance. After a few months I decided I would go to the hospital and would ask for a nerve block in the coccyx. A first injection did nothing, but a second one finally did something. At that time I just finished my thesis (after much delay due to my depression) and my best friend literally gave me a job at a good firm. I needed that, because I was afraid whether I could ever work with that irritating pain in my tailbone. Well, it wasn't always easy, but with coccyx cushions and some motivation I succeeded and finally started my career. I was still in a depression and couldn't see me with a girl anytime soon, but I tried to live with that.

Fast forward to May 2018. I met the girl of my dreams and finally all my issues with girls was gone! The problem was, she only still had a BF, so there was a period of 1 week where she was in doubt what she had to do. At the end she choose me. Finally I had a new life, a new GF, and I had learned to live with my coccyx pain. I used to masturbate once a day, and that was now upgraded to having sex once a day. Then after two weeks we went on a day, I was really aroused all day long, and then suddenly while sitting I noticed a sudden occurrence of pressure in my left testicle while sitting. A heavy feeling and sensitive too touch. And as you can expect, I am still dealing with this.... : (

After seeing urologists (std test clean, no inguinal hernia, no varicocele, no infection, but given 10 days of Cipro), neurologists (clean MRI, only an old deviation in my coccyx) and pain specialists (pregabalin, amitriptyline) I ended up at a pelvic PT. This took 3 months, in which I laid in my bed, totally depressed, because my testicles (sometimes left, sometimes right) are so sore. Very sensible. I cannot wear tight jeans. Luckily my tailbone pain was so little / not existing, that I could lay on my back and have some rest.

I went to a pelvic PT, but that was horrible. She rammed her finger up my ass, said she felt some tension, and that was that. I just needed to breath better. I was devastated and left.

One month ago, I started to have the feeling of a golfball when sitting. Pain in my rectum, sometimes like a knife. Also the tailbone pain returned massively, which is so annoying, even when lying down.

So here I am now:
- Pain in my testicles (very sore, all day long) Sometimes left, sometimes right.
- Pain in my rectum (when sitting, like a knife, sometimes at night) Just a feeling of high pressure
- Pain in my coccyx (when lying down: I do not even attempt to sit, I'm too scared)
- Very tight abs. I was a gym junk and I developed the tendency to suck in my gut to flex those abs.
- No pain with urinating. It is kind of frequent (every 2 hours), but I also drink a lot of water.
- No pain during ejaculating. I try to have sex with my GF to make her happy, but afterwards it is sometimes better and sometimes worse.
- No change in erection

I am unable to walk or sit. I tried to walk everyday for 30 minutes, but the testicle pain makes me so sick. It is sooooo uncomfortable. My work says that I still need to work for half days (4 hours), which I do in bed, crying because every position hurts.

It is hitting me so hard. I cry everyday and I'm afraid I won't have a future. I even wrote a goodbye letter, which made me throw up so hard.

I think that I have CPPS (although I do not have any problems or pain with urinating), but I am not sure. Every story that I read talks about problems with urinating, but that is the only thing I do NOT have.

I have read Headache in the Pelvis and the Cockblock book. I stretch 3 times a day, I do meditation (Headspace) and I watch my breathing. My breathing is very bad, which increases when I talk. I'm a stutterer, which makes it that talking is more difficult for me. I already take amitriptyline (75mg daily), magnesium, B12, probiotics, omega 3, cbd pills, and I stopped with coffee and alcohol.

I also bought a Therawand which came in today. I tried to use it, but it made me cry. I am so afraid to do it the wrong way or that I make it worse. I felt like a loser.

Next Wednesday the hospital will do a new nerve block at my coccyx (S3). They hope that this will calm down the area.

My questions are:

1. Based on my symptoms, do you think I have CPPS or not?
2. Could the pain originate from my coccyx? Which aggrevates the pelvic floor and therefore the testicle?
3. Does perhaps anyone know a good pelvic floor PT in the Netherlands? I don't want to go back to my previous one..
4. Any other tips?

I am very desperate and sometimes I even think about why I should continue my life. I am in pain for the whole day, I cry a lot, I cannot go outside because of the pain, I cannot enjoy sex with my GF because of the pain and the anxiety...

Pls pls pls, help me : (

[ChgoGuy]

I'm still trying to figure this all out on my own. I have okay days and horrible days. Today is a horrible one. I have been in your place early on with so many of the feelings and emotions. But there are better people on here to give you the answers to help you overcome this than I.

Do yourself a favor! Accept that you are not alone and others feel your pain. I have the pain plus I feel I have to take a brutal piss almost all the time. Your #1 problem, is that fear, and that fear is what's always going to stand in the way of getting better. I am more pissed at doctors these days then I have fear. I know its hard, but you got to say fuck the fear. Since you've read Headache in the Pelvis - good! Read it again. I started using the wand not too long ago. You can do it! The only drawback is that fingers can feel a tight spot and a wand can't. But YOU can do this. If I can do it, anybody can. Put some faith in yourself, because YOU are going to be the guy that fixes YOU!

I'm going to let others like Webslave comment. He is "The Man" when it comes to this shit. You got to respect that his honesty can be brutal and tough to take, but he's a bright light in all of this. There are a few good others too who can help. Get out of bed. I know I didn't want to today, but pick yourself up and start swinging. The road might me long with many ups and downs and a lot of potholes, but this forum is a good start. Just say enough is enough!

[webslave]

1. Yes, you do. Nothing unusual in your symptoms. Most of us have been there. Urination-related symptoms are not essential or universal for CPPS patients, BTW
2. No, the entire pelvic nerve plexus is aroused and pain is shifting from area to area, as you have found.
3. Have you tried Fetske Hogen Esch? Dr Wise will not recommend her, but I don't know anyone else there...
4. Start with Carl's list viewtopic.php?f=5&t=6475

[MrDavid]

@ChgoGuy:

Thanks for the kind reply :)

"Put some faith in yourself, because YOU are going to be the guy that fixes YOU!" This is exactly what I am trying to do. I am someone who is used to be in pain, the only thing that I cannot stand is that sore feeling in my testicles. It makes me sick when I stand, sit or walk. Maybe I should just ignore that and try to go outside and live.

@Webslave:

Thanks for your time to reply.

1. OK, thank you. I just wasn't sure whether urination-related symptoms should always be a part of the condition.
2. Perhaps I formulated by question wrong. Could it be that the problem with my tailbone (2.5 years) made by pelvic floor even more tight, eventually till the point that my testicles began to hurt, and after that my rectum?
3. Yes I have looked on her website, but unfortunately she is not covered by my insurance (1500 EUR). I have very little money and as I cannot fully work anymore, this will only become less. My insurance covers 32 sessions with a PT, so I really would like to give that a shot first. I guess I just have to start looking again. The problem is that they are all focussed on woman and simply breathing patterns, and not on males and triggerpoints. My previous PT could also schedule only once in 2-3 weeks. This isn't enough to tackle the triggerpoints right?
4. I looked at the list, and the only things I haven't done are any accredited quercetin product and internal trigger points. I though that any accredited quercetin product is more about urinary symptoms, but could it also be beneficial for me?

[webslave]

1. --
2. There is no actual physical problem with your tailbone, or else the medics would have found it. I presume you've had imaging of the area (x-ray, ultrasound, CT scan, MRI)? Nerve blocks are not really great for most men, BTW. They can cause pain, at worst. Dr Dimitrakov has said this about traditional nerve blocks, which are usually a form of anesthetic like lidocaine: "Traditional nerve blocks just trigger an already pre-existing neuropathic pain state by releasing pain mediators at the site of the block (e.g. NGF, CGRP)." viewtopic.php?f=20&t=134 But yes, the so-called tailbone pain, through windup and neural cross talk, can make pain appear everywhere in the same plexus.
3. Pity you cannot see her. Call her and ask who to see, she may know someone covered by your insurance. No, once every few weeks is pretty useless.
4. No, any accredited quercetin product is more about PAIN. You owe it to yourself to try it.

[MrDavid]

They have done a MRI and they found an old deviation: that it was broken somewhere in my past but that it healed. Now I am left with a small 'dent' in my coccyx. That's why they want to do an injection next week to stop a possible new inflammation in the area.

I would be pleased if that decreased the pain in the coccyx, so that I have more rest in my mind and I can do the actual stretches. I am having a very hard time to meditate, because I cannot sit or lay on my back. So if the coccyx hurts less, it could be beneficial for relaxing the pelvic floor, right?

I also scheduled a psychologist in 3 weeks who is known for treating people with chronic pain. I hope she can treats me for my anxiety.

I will also look at the Quercetin. I looked at the website, but the shipping costs to Holland are higher than the product itself.. I will need to think about that.

[webslave]

Try the pain blocks if there is evidence of damage, as imaging has shown. But don't expect too much.

[MrDavid]

I believe (for 99 percent sure) that I have CPPS and that I can me healed by relaxation techniques, breathing techniques, stretching routines, and triggerpoint releases.

My only hope for the injection is that the coccyx pain won't future increase and maybe decrease. I know that it won't stop my testicle or rectum problem.

I have also two more questions, maybe you know the answers:
- (English is not my first language and I don't know the proper words for this) My scrotum is getting 'tight' more often these days than it was before I had these CPPS issues (like it does when the weather is cold). Is this also related to a tight pelvic floor?
- My symptoms of testicle pain are increasing when I feel the urge for a bowel movement (starting an hour for the actual toillet visit). Is that something I can decrease, or is it simply related to CPPS?

[webslave]

I'm in a rush now, but briefly 1) yes and 2) it sounds CPPS related although not typical, and so should decrease as you improve

[Quigly]

I'm so glad you found this forum I sincerely believe you are in the right place. I had all of your symptoms one year and 3 months ago, and now depending on the day I'm 85 to 90% healed. If I found this forum a year earlier I would of saved a lot of time and money. My bit to offer you here is purchase the book " A Headache in the Pelvis " its a very valuable tool if you understand and utilize its concepts faithfully. Another thing that helped me is pelvic floor drops, I had no idea I was "clenching" up down there all the time. Another thing is mind set, please understand this is going to take time to heal, you didn't get here in one day so give yourself time to get better. Now that your here you are going to start to stabilize and slowly by slowly your are going to start to heal. As ChgoGuy said listen to Webslave the man knows this stuff and, start getting your mind ok with internal work, its been a turning point for a lot of us.

[MrDavid]

@ Webslave: Thank you for the clarification. It makes sense that it is all linked.

@ Quigly: I keep saying it to everyone, but I really mean it. Thank you for taking the time to reply and help me.
- I did read the Headache in the Pelvis and it was a very good read. Very soon I will start reading it again.
- Dropping the pelvic floor is also something I try to do. I am now looking for a kind of bracelet (as mentioned in HITP) that reminds you at a certain interval to watch your breathing / tension.
- Mindset is for me the hardest part. What was the major thing that helped you with your mindset? Yesterday I bought a book from Dr Sarno, as it was mentioned in some other threads on this forum. Also I'm looking at a forum from TMS and look at their success stories. I'm not there yet to think that it is all psychological, but I do think that it is linked.
- Internal massage: I am very scared to do something wrong, so I am trying to contact some pelvic PTs around my city to see whether they know their stuff. Seems to be a big problem around here: all biofeedback, no triggerpoint release....

Then a question that I am really struggling with is that I keep checking whether I have pain. I keep touching my coccyx or my testicle every @#% minute to see if it hurts and I cannot stop this pattern. "Oh it doesn't hurt" *keep poking till some place hurts "See it hurts!!". Or when it is already hurting, I keep checking where it hurts the most.

Can someone help me with this problem? A certain technique? Or maybe a book on this subject?

[webslave]

I keep touching my coccyx or my testicle every @#% minute to see if it hurts and I cannot stop this pattern. "Oh it doesn't hurt" *keep poking till some place hurts "See it hurts!!". Or when it is already hurting, I keep checking where it hurts the most.
Can someone help me with this problem? A certain technique? Or maybe a book on this subject?

We had a whole thread about this recently, can't find it. But this one is good too:
viewtopic.php?f=37&t=8416

[Quigly]

- Mindset is for me the hardest part. What was the major thing that helped you with your mindset?

I guess the thing that helped me was learning my pain is not the enemy, and I don't need to spend every minute and resource I have conquering it. That just leads to a hyper fixation that monopolizes your life. I bet right now you're at the point where your only half focused (or less) on what your doing, and the rest of your brain is thinking about the pain. That's what I was doing, and why not pain really sucks. I realized its just my body letting me know we have things to deal with here and it can't be ignored anymore. I learned that my body does not want to be in pain, so in need to stop punishing it with the mind. I do my rehab everyday and trust that I'm going to get better and do my best not to dwell. I try to watch something funny everyday and laugh. I hadn't laughed in so long my wife and kids actually commented on it when I did. I also just recently learned, I don't want to be how I was before the pain. I have lost 30 pounds that I needed to lose, learned so much about foods and diet, health and hygiene, vitamins and minerals, and how to just "breathe" during this ordeal. Anyways hope this helps, I bet you have already found a certain level of comfort knowing you are not in this alone, it was for me.

[MrDavid]

Here I am again, crying. I haven't worn any jeans from the day that my testicle pain started. The idea was just so scary, it already gave me pain. Also I haven't left my room for the last month (hospital was always over the phone).

All day I read about TMS and overcoming your fears.

So an hour ago I thought: f.ck that, I'm going to wear those jeans, and I'm going to the shops. I will buy something, whatever it was, and go home.

From the moment I pulled on those jeans I was so sick by the pressure of the jeans on my testicle. It was horrible. I wanted to cry, but I walked, and I walked.

It took 30 minutes, and now I'm home crying..

[webslave]

Mental attitude is extremely important in overcoming this condition. Crying is a sign of catastrophizing, and catastrophizing leads to poor longterm outcomes (lots of research about it in the Research section of this forum). Get psychological help to cope with this if you cannot adjust outlook on your own.