I feel so beaten down...

[elitynski]

I had already posted today, but tonight...I feel so beaten down.

I've already done the anti-biotics thing and I'm actually seeing a top URO (Dr. Schaeffer) on Friday in Chicago. He is the Urology Chair at Northwestern and he has done a lot of research / speaking, etc. on Prostatitis and I know he is not a miracle worker but I thought I could get a better perspective on what is going on. I'm going to ask him lots of questions (esp about SP, TP Massage, Quercetin)

At the same time I am working on losing weight. I'm at about 350 and I'm doing it naturally - diet and exercise. Today one of my co-workers asked if I thought I'd need a body lift after I lost the weight. I had always thought I might have some extra stomach skin - which depending on how much - I would consider whether surgery was worth it or not - I won't know until I actually lose the weight.

I also have sleep apnea (which is another reason I want the weight off) and I'm not sure if this contributing to the frequency - I usually wake up early in the morning and spend another 2 hours lying in bed going to urinate every 15-20 mins. The apneas can cause your oxygen / carbon dioxide exchange to malfunction and your body then expresses a hormone which makes you need to urinate.

Pills...Pills...and more pills. In addition to UROXYTROL & ENABLEX, plus some NSAIDs and COLACE, I'm now on Zoloft to help with some of the depression this change has brought on plus a small amt of Xanax before bed to help with sleeping. The Zoloft effect is too early to tell but hopefully we'll see if I feel better over the next week.

I just feel like I'm going through so much right now - struggling from moment to moment, hour to hour, and day to day. I think that I am really fighting with accepting this condition as something I have to deal with and that it's simply part of my journey right now.

I don't want to just accept what is going on - I really want to fight and say "hey, this thing isn't going to take over my life, but I'm going to deal with it - no matter what it takes."

I have been encouraged by many of your posts and I know that this has to get better - it seems like so many of you have made progress by trying to find things that make your symptoms better.

I know weight loss will only help me and the exercise I'm doing will be beneficial in the long run. I can't think about the length of the journey - only that I'm walking it one day at a time.

Thanks for letting me express my feelings.

[scotsman]

Life can be really shitty at times and it's not always easy to keep a postive outlook. Sometimes we can but other times the depression/downtimes can hit us like waves.

You're doing a great job losing the weight. I lost 120lbs through eating less and exercise and with losing the weight slowly, and by drinking LOTS of water, I managed to avoid the excess skin issues.

I'd strongly suggest trying to see Dr Wise at Stanford - and even start by just giving him a phone and getting some encouragement/support that way.

Richard.

[BigStoneMax]

Richard,

I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. I've had chronic prostatitis / chronic pelvic pain syndrome for approx. 12 years and have gone through many difficult times. If it was not for God and my family I am sure I would not be here today.

Your right about taking it one day at a time. Otherwise it seems so overwhelming.

Hope you do better soon.

[scoobysnacks]

Hang in there...one day at a time is the best advice I can give. You have to have patience and perseverance--bottom line. Nothing is a quick fix in this, whether it be losing the weight or healing the pelvis.

I've had this for 4.5 yrs now, and I've been on the road to recovery for about 1.5 yrs, but really just 8 mos post Stanford. Some days are good, some okay, and some arent too good. But, I know I can manage this thing and go on with my life. The cool thing is most days go towards the good side of things.

I was at an annual golf outing this past weekend, and I thought at one point, man, this time last year I was constantly symptomatic, thats not the case now. So it was easy to see I've improved, albeit, slow, but thats the MO with this crap.

Id lean on this board, AHIP and a good PT to get going in the right direction.

Regards,

Ss

[carld]

Nothing like CP/CPPS to bring a man to His knees. We have all been there so keep pushing through. Follow the protocol and try your very best to loose the extra weight. You have friends here....

[GP2]

Yes its the toughest challenge we may all face but it can be overcome and then you will certainly have a different outlook on life. I always look at all the old posters and how they've got better over the years to lift my spirits.

Example - skip back to posts from 2004. Are the posters names you dont recognize? YES. Why - because most of them are much better now & no longer feel a need to post.

Carl, Scooby, myself and others are passed the stage of ultimate despair at this condition. I was having panic attacks and not eating when I came down with this. Now we're at the stage of acceptance & dealing with it one day at a time. You may be depressed for a good while but the quicker you start stretching, relaxing, eating well at least you know you are some way on the path towards healing...