Bacterial or Psychological: Oral Sex Origin

[stanfelder]

Apparently my situation is not overly unique, but perhaps I can add some detail and gain some opinions from others in here. My situation started with a very short <2 min oral sex event at a massage parlor. I remember being upset about it right then and there, as I was not expecting that to occur. I have a family that I never intended on hurting, and I have a lot of major life events all happening at the same time (Some of which likely drove me to seek a relaxing massage in the first place).

Anyway, all STD tests of any kind were negative, on multiple occasions out to 6 weeks. What threw me into a bit of panic was learning about NGU, which I never knew of. Since it's something that is not easily tested for, and I couldn't get a black and white answer, I obsessed over it. I went to my primary care doc who gave me a urinalysis and said all was good. I went to a urologist, same thing. They both said it was all in my head, however the pain/sensations I was experiencing certainly couldn't be coincidental. I never experienced pain when urinating or any discharge. However, over the course of several weeks, I had intermittent symptoms of perineum, anus, inner thighs, penile and penis tip, sit bones, tailbone burning/discomfort. I've never experienced it before, but I was CONVINCED it was NGU causing an infection in my entire region. I used multiple user names and paid lots of fees to consult with STD docs online at "Ask the Experts," to which every answer was the same; "These symptoms are not indicative of NGU or any other STI, google CPPS."

I finally returned to my urologist to talk about prostatitis. He didn't seem overly convinced, and likely was thinking that it was still all in my head, but he listened to my story. He gave me a DRE which he said felt normal. He then said that my explanation could be prostatitis, and prescribed me 30-days of Cipro. I was somewhat relieved and filled the script. I took 1 pill, felt like I was on acid, and never took another since.

My questions:
1) I feel like the Cipro was a first level attempt at some sort of treatment. There was no bacteria proven. I guess that's what the docs do, start there? I'm not convinced I need it, plus the side effects were HORRENDOUS.Has anyone experienced remarkable improvement with this drug worth accepting the side effects?

2) The online docs are steadfast that there are numerous studies attempting to link oral sex to prostatitis and it has never been proven. Further, mycoplasma and ureaplasma have been disproved many times since the 70's. They claim the information from posters on boards like this are simply inaccurate. Thoughts?

3) Have others here experienced their issues which can be traced to anxiety/guilt? My levels of each are 12/10, enough so that I have vomited a few times when really worked up, lost over 10 lbs without much of an appetite, and am generally miserable about my decision. Guilt is a terrible emotion.

4) My symptoms went from burning perineum, thighs and penis tip, to now being gone after about 4-5 weeks, replaced by the golf ball feeling. However, these are and were intermittent. Do you guys feel pain all the time? For example, when sleeping at night and I awake to urinate, nothing is bothering me. But when I wake up, and feel like my finger is stuck in an electrical socket, things start to bother me. My rational side knows it's anxiety, but my hypochondriac side thinks infection.

5) It never has hurt to pee, ejaculation does not hurt, etc. However, sometimes I feel that the meatus is a little more red and "swollen" than it should be. I'm not sure that's even accurate because I've never looked at it this much in my life.

I guess I'm trying to figure out if what I've experienced, intermittently, is in fact a bacterial infection from saliva and I have to really treat it or be in for some trouble. Or, if my extremely high guilt and genitally focused anxiety can actually manifest these symptoms and the better bet is to get my head right, and the body should follow. Thanks for any advice and discussion.

[webslave]

They were right. It IS all in your head. So is the pain. We've seen so many guys with guilt report pelvic pain after oral sex, with negative tests, that it's become a common refrain here. If you search this site for "oral sex" and/or "guilt", you'll get the idea.

1. Keep away from Cipro. You don't need it.
2. "Boards like this?" You must mean other boards; we don't encourage infection obsessions here
3. Plenty. You're a classic case. :)
4. All fairly routine CPPS symptoms
5. Not significant

[stanfelder]

Thank you for the reply!! I stumbled across a different forum for this condition before I found this one, and there are an abundance of guys on there hell bent on bacteria causing infection and they’re sending urine and semen samples to some lab in a texas. It sounds so maddening. That is what prompted me to ask the questions to the online doc about that being a terrible reality.

I will certainly search the forum for other examples here that may be a little more reassuring. As a summary, can you define what you’ve seen here with this same scenario? Guilt and regret lead to real painful feelings, but do they ever get relief? I’m still somewhat in disbelief that the mind can cause such fearful symptoms. I’ve been in a real tough spot for almost 3 months now....

[webslave]

You're best off just searching and reading here. Sorry, flat out busy right now or I'd write more...

[stanfelder]

Let me ask you this....The pain I experienced in the beginning of this ordeal was in the perineum, anus, penis, thighs, etc. However, about 10 weeks after the oral event, it now feels as if the prostate itself is sore, like the "golf ball" feeling. It comes and goes in severity, and is not constant. My uro said it didn't feel abnormal, and he doesn't seem overly interested in testing secretions to look for infection. With CPPS, I clearly understood the symptoms of the areas where it started. What I'm concerned about, is the pain in the area where the prostate resides. Could this be more of a sign of infection, or does CPPS also refer pain from the prostate/anus region? It's a bit different from the burning discomfort that I'm sure pelvic muscles were causing earlier. This is soreness, with a little sting in the anus. It feels like the prostate could be enlarged, but I know it's not from the DRE. I'm trying to determine if the Cipro makes sense to take, although I really don't want to mess with that medicine.

I also have somewhat cloudy urine in the morning. Mind you, this is me very closely analyzing it with a flashlight. Yes, I am very worked up over this situation and the potential damage to my family. I've been able to hold urine for hours during the day and it doesn't seem cloudy, yet in the morning it is. The docs I've talked to are adamant I don't have NGU, and that I am overthinking it. I'm just trying to find out what might cause a bit of cloudy urine in the am.

[European]

I think it might be difficult to distinguish whether your pain is coming from prostate or the adjacent muscles e.g. frontal portion of levator ani. Moreover there is a lot of nerve crosstalk. YOu might be classic CPPS case in early stages but of course never underestimate every new symptom. But I feel that there might be a lot of anxiety related stuff in your case.

[stanfelder]

Thank you for that! You are spot on with the anxiety comment. The pain comes and goes, but as a reference, this morning I jolted out of bed at 4am and never fell back asleep. Moreover, I had a bit of cloudy urine which further increased anxiety. Not only am I struggling with my dalliance, there are many major, life changing events going on in my relationship right now that would be stressful by themselves. This added self-inflcted issue is crushing me. But, before I cave into just simply being anxiety, I am certainly concerned with more of a pain feeling where the prostate is itself. It's almost like the perineum pain has subsided and a new phase is upon me with the prostate pain. It certainly feels like a golf ball is wedged up my arse. But your words are encouraging regarding adjacent muscles. I really hope that's what it is. If only I could know for sure it was stress related, I could focus elsewhere and try to move on with my life.

And if it were indeed an infection, and I am refusing to take the Cipro, what happens then? Or is that just speculation....

[webslave]

And if it were indeed an infection, and I am refusing to take the Cipro, what happens then? Or is that just speculation....

viewtopic.php?p=20222#p20222

[stanfelder]

Very helpful, thank you!

[stanfelder]

I haven't studied this hard since college, and man is there differing information everywhere about this issue!

I'm not sure how I feel about infection vs non-infection yet. I just started reading a Headache in the Pelvis and so far it's a great read. I made the mistake of browsing other forums and jeez are they infectious focused. I relate in a way though; the coincidental timeline of oral sex with a perceived high-risk partner just screams bacteria. But anyway, I'm trying not to go down that rabbit hole.

What I would like to ask is about the timeline of CPPS symptoms. As I earlier stated, in the beginning of my journey, I felt burning and pain mainly in the perineum and anus, as well as the penis. Most of those areas have subsided. 11 weeks after possible bacteria exposure, relevant perhaps only to help keep a timeline of events, the pain is now an aching feeling of a golf ball lodged inside of me that seems to persist most of the day. And just today, I now have lower back pain. Are these 2 symptoms apparent in CPPS, presumably possible without infection, especially progressing over the course of 11 weeks? My concern is, the pain has become transient, and is moving around the region. It stopped in some places, and began in others. And now, my lower back hurts. I'm no doctor, but is that how infection works, by spreading? If classical non-bacterial CPPS behaves in this way, I can deal with it. I don't want to ignore what could be an infection though, and my wife is getting a pap smear on Monday and of course the doom and gloom side of me says there will be some magical revelation during that test showing bacteria galore from yours truly.

Also, just to verify, for those that have been here long, as well as what I've seen on the "other" forum, rounds of antibiotics don't seem to be helping anyone, right? And if so, it's only temporarily a placebo affect or from their anti-inflammatory properties?

[rjdemarx]

Wow, your story is identical to mine. The pain, tightness, golf-ball feeling are all real and typical CPPS. It's normal to think this is bacterial, but that's only because nobody ever talks about CPPS. It's a completely foreign concept until it happens to you. Rest assured, these symptoms are CPPS caused by a sudden stress event. Essentially, your subconscious mind gave you a punch in the nuts to remind you just how important your family is to you. Also think, tail between the legs. Regarding the encounter,in the grand scheme of things its nothing, so try to forgive and forget. Ultimately, it was the fear that if an STD was discovered, you could lose it all. This caused all of your muscles to involuntarily clench up, squeezing nerves in the process, and ultimately causing the symptoms you are having. You don't have an STD. But, now you have a nervous system that is wound-up along with some tight muscles that easily react to stressors in your life. It will take some time to unwind. For me it's been 7 months; it's a slow process. But if you focus on forgiving yourself, reducing stress, and getting some PT, then your body will get back to normal. Also, try to flip your thinking about this whole thing. Consider it a gift of sorts. You dodged a bullet and learned a valuable lesson about what is most important in your life. You can continue to be a great dad, a great husband and soon enough this will all be a distant memory.

[rjdemarx]

Also, I should mention that my issue started with a slight pain in the penis / urethra, then to a cold tip sensation, then to a itchy tight anus, which turned into golf ball feeling with sitting discomfort. All along I would get post urination dribble and an irritated feeling. Then aches in muscles around my anus. Now I wake-up fine, but throughout the day tension will build in my perineum causing a mild ache and I'll get a persistent irritated feeling on the underside of my penis. It's all winding down and my mental state is one where I know this can be conquered.

[stanfelder]

Damn man, that's the best thing I could have possibly read! You are 1,000% right. This little sub-2 minute BS has taken 3-months of my life from me. And you are right about flipping the thinking about it. It is a gift. It's a lesson that it's not ok to go to those disgusting places and my family is important to me. We are about to get married and also in the process of buying a house. Most of these stressors is what drove me to the damn massage, to chill out. What has added to my stress is the panic that drove me to the local doctor's office over the possibility of NGU since I had no idea what was causing this. Now there is a trail of visits and a prescription that I may have to explain later. Or maybe not, who knows. It just adds to the stress.....

Thanks again for taking the time to write that. It's been a hell of a ride and I just need to get my head around the fact that I don't have some Ureaplasma or whatever else BS bacteria causing symptoms in me.

[rjdemarx]

I was exactly where you were with respect to thinking it was NGO, etc. The faster you get past that notion, the faster you will be on your way to recovery. Another positive is that you know the trigger - a stressful event. So there is a very high probability that your body will revert to its old self in time. Whereas some of the fellas on this forum can't pinpoint what caused their issue. That said, an event like this is usually the last straw because you were already in a high state of stress. I was extremely stressed, went overseas, made a mistake, and whamo! It could take time to wind-down, but now you know that your own healing is within your own control. Trust that your body wants to get back to its old self and help it along with relaxation, PT, etc. I went to PT today and she identified some very tight spots in my abdomen and pelvic floor, all highly likely culprits to my issues. A positive because now we have something else to work on.

[stanfelder]

Also, I should mention that my issue started with a slight pain in the penis / urethra, then to a cold tip sensation, then to a itchy tight anus, which turned into golf ball feeling with sitting discomfort. All along I would get post urination dribble and an irritated feeling. Then aches in muscles around my anus. Now I wake-up fine, but throughout the day tension will build in my perineum causing a mild ache and I'll get a persistent irritated feeling on the underside of my penis. It's all winding down and my mental state is one where I know this can be conquered.

Mine started as perineum pain/burning feeling that ran through the penis and I FREAKED. I was analyzing everything, could have sworn the perineum was red and I was screwed. I'm even analyzing my urine in the toilet with a flashlight. I also did full testing 3 times over the course of 6 weeks. It's been insanity, and for what? Not even remotely worth it. And of course I'm paranoid about her upcoming OB visit. No wonder I lost over 10 lbs.