Can anybody offer a solution?

[Glenn]

Hi ,I've posted on here before during the last 3+ years that I have had problems with frequent urination,rectal muscle spasm,involuntary muscle flutterings,sharp pains and twisting and weird,unexplainable symptoms in my genitals,gut ,arms and legs.It started after my stupid idea of sticking a long,narrow feather duster up my rectum in the pursuit of sexual gratification.I can't begin to explain what hell my life has been since.I don't know where else to turn.I have had enough of life and the sad thing is I'm only 29.My Fiancee doesn't know about my problems.I can't bring myself to tell her.I just hope that she doesn't notice my need to use the toilet so frequently and make excuses to relieve myself.I would love to know why when I have drunk say,a pint and a half or two of water,beer or whatever,that I get a sudden ,pressure urge to urinate,then when I go to the toilet hardly much urine comes out.I go back to my friends,then a real pressure pain builds up and I feel the desperate need to void again around 10 to 20 minutes later.I wee more the next time,but still not a huge amount comes out,yet I can find myself feeling the need to go again a few minutes after,or because my bladder then has an uncomfortable feeling inside,and I get little spasmodic feelings inside the penis if I try to hold.The sudden frequency is such a problem that I constantly pee small amounts into my pants while trying to hold.Its like since what I did,I have no control over my bodily functions.Eveything feels different to how it should be.The problem seems to be in my gut,what with rumbling and gurgling sensations and involuntary spasm in my penis and rectal muscles.I get the penal shrinkage problem and it seems to twist and take on alife of its own.I am full of gas,and excreting air a lot of the time now.I never did see the piece of plastic come out of my body,but why would it cause me such huge problems.I have had an ultrasound that shows my voiding as within normal boundaries.I have had blood tests,urine tests.Injections of a lipid Vitamin B substance.Quercetin.Quercetin .Bladder supplements.Neurontin,anti-biotics,all to no avail.The doc just says that I have IBS.IBS surely though does not give you the constant sensations in the rectum and gut and penis/bladder that I now have? Its been over 3 years now and I am going nowhere with my life.I have had physical PT work ,but this still has not solved my problems .I live life according to how my arse and gut/bladder feel.I have had enough.Please come somebody shed some light on my case and possible ways in which I might be able to find a light at the end of this hugely depressing tunnel.Thanks for reading.All the best, Glenn.

[webslave]

Only possibility I can think of is that the duster was pressed against your prostate too hard and gave you a stricture, which could account for the difficulty urinating. I suggest you have a cystoscopy to rule out stricture and then a sigmoidoscopy to investigate the rectum, just to set your mind at rest.

[NoMoPain]

Glenn,

As I read your post I can feel your suffering. I know what kind of suffering you are going through as I went through plenty of that myself.

I had the same types of symptoms and problems you mentioned for many many years. However, I have been generally pain and symptom free for some time now. For me it is a combination of Physical Therapy, Progressive Relaxation, and a form of Cognitive Therapy (Byron Katie).

The one most important message I want to communicate to you is that you have the ability to get much much better. You can make a full or near full recovery. It won't be easy but you can do it.

Next time you feel the urge to urinate try to postpone a few minutes and do some abdominal breathing and you may very well see the urge diminish. Keep practicing this over and over and eventually the intervals will get longer between urinations. Keep dropping the pelvic muscles, work the lower abdomen with a Theracane. You can do this.

[Glenn]

Sorry,I forgot to mention that I have had a cystoscopy and a sigmoidoscopy too.They only revealed a slightly enlarged prostate.

[webslave]

Then you probably have what we have and should follow all the advice given here.

[Ginty]

Hi Glenn,
I've replied to you in the past and I just couldn't resist this time either since your story/syptoms sound so similar to mine.
In my non-professional opinion I also think you need cognitive therapy, and in addition to the Byron Katie book/tape mentioned above I would also recommend a book called "Feeling Good" by David Burns. Also some form of anti-anxiety medication should also be investigated with your doctor.
Your symptoms do sound typical and I have had all of what you mention, including the less common ones such as the sore arms an legs and a churning stomach.
About a year or so ago like clockwork I would develop chest pains after urinating. I was 100% convinced there was something seriously wrong and I was going to die. Needless to say I didn't and my life is considerably better now due to similar therapy.
I am not saying you will get completely free from your symptoms from this but you can put them in perspective such that you can live happlily with them. There is something about bottling things up that firstly contributes to this kind of disorder in the first place, but more than that magnifies it's effect on you, leading to depression and anxiety.
The fact that you have not mentioned this to your fiancee shows that you do this - you have replayed the thought that telling her will be disaterous, so much so that I bet now you cannot even imagine doing it.
However the fact that you have a fiancee, who even more incredibly doesn't know about this, shows that you have incredible inner strength and that it is not taking over your life completely.
Try writing down your worst fears in the first person, the worst you can imagine such as "I have fatally damaged my body and I will be dead within 1 year" - or whatever you fear. When you do this you can start to see them objectively for what they are, and then you can start to reject them. By doing this the percieved effect of your symptoms will lessen and in turn your body can get a chance to heal.
It sounds stupid but it really does work.
About a month ago I had multiple sore glands for a number of weeks. I didn't tell anyone and grew convinced this was the cancer I had feared all along now spreading. However I discussed this with my wife and wrote down these fears as I described above and honestly it was gone within a day or two.
Rember it is a very common symptom of anxiety/depression to think "Yeah that's all well and good for you but it won't work with me. My situation is way more serious than that!".
You also need to deal with the guilt surrounding what you consider to be the self imposed cause of this. I imagine this is underlying a lot of the reason why you feel you cannot tell people about this.
Please keep in touch, it is good to hear from you again, I'm only sorry there has been no improvement. However isolation and dealing with this kind of thing alone is your worst enemy.

[CppsDad]

I agree with Ginty. Isolation is brutal. Use this forum as much as you need to keep from being isolated. And I'd tell your fiancee. You might have this for a little while longer, and it will be one less thing that you have to keep inside. Besides, she might be helpful in planning social events that are easier for you (such as dinner at home instead of a restaurant), and can even cover for you if you have to get up one too many times by saying things like "honey, please go check to see if our table is ready yet". Silly, I know. But there is little downside to having her understand your pain. The burden is incredible, and having your closest friend and life partner know about it seems obvious to me.

You say you've done PT for 3 years. Can you please describe exactly what was done, and what else you have been doing to help your case? I'm not suggesting that you've been doing the wrong things, but it would be nice to know your routine in case there are things that you are missing. A lot of people have had PT, but it has not been focussed in the right areas.

Mike

[alprost]

I have had physical PT work ,but this still has not solved my problems.

Glenn, where did you get this done? What Physio did you see - was it here in the UK? What did the Physio sessions consist of i.e. what did they do? How many sessions did you have?

[inflamed]

Yeh I agree what kind of physio did you get done, the only one who does internal work near England seems to be Bill Taylor



contact details

[Glenn]

Sorry for not replying sooner,guys,but I have limited computer access at the moment.Actually,I should rephrase the fact that PT didn't help me,because it did slightly.I had several sessions with Bill Taylor,who released a lot of trigger points in my rectum,and thus defecating now is not half as sore as it was pre-Bill Taylor.Bill actually said to me that he had taken me as far as he could go,and that I didn't have any more trigger points.At the start of the treatment,my pelvic floor was very tense and tight,but by the end of my sessions his finger would slide in under no resistence,which was good.I still think all my my problems lie in the bowels and guts,where the problem manifested itself ,after what I initially did.Thanks for all your helpful replies and support over the last 3 and a bit years.I know you mean well with what you are saying,but I fail to see how Cognitive therapy would help problems which are physically imposing themselves.Yes,it would probably help with depression,but I think I am over the stage of thinking that I am going to die,and that doesn't faze me any more.I just would love to improve my quality of life for myself,as at the moment,everyday I wake ,I know I am going to go through the mill again,and I despair with it.I just don't want to accept this .There must be a reason for my body acting in this way.Dr Jordan Dimitrakov once said to me that seems to think that one defect in the gut is responsible for my symptoms.The question is"What? I wish I could answer that because it goes round in my head day in,day out.Thanks a lot ,all the same.All the best to you.
Glenn,

[webslave]

I know you mean well with what you are saying,but I fail to see how Cognitive therapy would help problems which are physically imposing themselves....

....[my problem] goes round in my head day in,day out.

You answer your own question, grasshopper

[LightningTree]

I think you are in a tough place right now. But I agree you should speak with your fiance. You can talk here as much as you like. We've been where you have been, with the theories of guilt and preminition of visceral damage, etc. By all means, let doctors check you out.

There are many echos in what you are saying that we can relate to. Its hard to accept CPPS. (I never did, it made me fight by pursuing the Stanford/Wise-Anderson Protocol.) Its easy to assume guilty pleasures lead to the problem. I've read theories on here about drug use, masturbation, infidelity, etc. Its also possible to find a doctor who will tell you the 'source' of your problem. We here will admit that it is clinically unknown in most cases. And you will be skeptical of the mind/.body connection. I was. I didn't believe any of that stuff until I figured out how to make it work for me. Its real. Looking back, I can't believe how ignorant our civilization is, generally, about being in touch with our bodies.

Anyways, search the forums and their messages.

Could your chronic prostatitis / chronic pelvic pain syndrome have a visceral cause? Possibly. Just try to remember that many conditions like IBS and chronic prostatitis / chronic pelvic pain syndrome can be exacerbated by stress. I'm not claiming that's the cause. I just know that healing required that I dealt with muscle tension, psychological stress levels, latent anxiety, etc.

[alprost]

.I had several sessions with Bill Taylor,who released a lot of trigger points in my rectum,and thus defecating now is not half as sore as it was pre-Bill Taylor.Bill actually said to me that he had taken me as far as he could go,and that I didn't have any more trigger points.,

Glenn, did you have any external trigger points treated?

[LightningTree]

involuntary spasm in my penis and rectal muscles.I get the penal shrinkage problem and it seems to twist and take on alife of its own.I am full of gas,and excreting air a lot of the time now.I never did see the piece of plastic come out of my body,but why would it cause me such huge problems.I have had an ultrasound that shows my voiding as within normal boundaries.I have had blood tests,urine tests.Injections of a lipid Vitamin B substance.Quercetin.Quercetin .Bladder

I also had muscle twitching and spasming for about 3 months. It was very frightening. How often does that happen? And like alprost said, did you do external trigger point work? That helped eliminate my spasms in the perineum.

[Glenn]

Hi ,in answer to Alprosts post,Bill Taylor did some external PT work on me as well.He released a few trigger points.Like I said,Bill just felt that he had done as much as he could with trigger points etc.I don't believe that on its own is the total answer to everyones problems,but its certainly worth doing to see how far it can take you.Bill said he seemed to think that there was a bit of IBS going on there,as I felt crampy.